Talk To Me, Baby

I hate Ikea.

Okay, that’s not true. I actually love Ikea. I just hating going to Ikea.

It’s always crowded and I can never find that one specific item that prompted the whole  trip in the first place. Not that there’s ever anyone to ask…

Even if I do find someone that works there, they either…

a) spend 20 minutes on some roundabout explanation that can basically be summed up in seven words: “I don’t know and I don’t care” or…

b) yelled at me in some angry, incoherent “seems-like-English-but-those-aren’t-real-words” variation of what I assume is a British accent.

At least, this was the case when Avery and I went to there last week…

Just when I was thoroughly hating life (and Ikea), Avery started to lose his patience. (Not that I blame him.)

I promised to let him press the buttons on the lift if he would just bear with me while I looked for just… one… last… thing…

Unconvinced, he headed straight for the doors. (Smart kid)

He reached for the “1” button when I explained to him that the first floor is called the ground floor here and the second floor is actually the first, and blah, blah-blah, blah blah until the doors opened once again.

As we got stepped off the lift, a man riding with us approached me and clumsily asked,“Are you… Um, did I hear… Uh, is that an American accent I detect?

“Yeah, we just moved here from the States,” I replied as a feeble half-apology for talking too much/blocking his way/suggesting that the ground floor could be anything but…

“Oh, thought so,” he replied, “I just love the American accent. It’s so… SEXY” (!!!)

Ummm, I think I like Ikea a little bit more now.

Well, except for those stupid arrows… always telling you where to go, but never taking you where you want to be. Stupid arrows!



Filed under Checky Monkeys, Rantings

5 responses to “Talk To Me, Baby

  1. You left out an important detail – what did the guy look like? Was he hot or was he creepy?

  2. HA! And I think british accents are sexy!

  3. So funny to hear someone say American accents are sexy. My almost 8-year-old daughter has already succumbed to the appeal of a British accent. She’s got a crush on a 12-year-old boy from Wales that’s in her acting program. I asked her once if she liked his accent and she blushed!!!

  4. I like IKEA but it is just so overwhelming! You need a map…. that says it all. It takes me an average of 2 hours to get in and get out of that store!

  5. I had a German man once tell me he loved my southern accent (I’m from Tenn.) I thought that was hilarious. It’s funny being the one thought of as having the accent.

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